Anger Management In Christian Marriage

May 31, 2011

Today’s advice for the Christian Marriage is very simple and worth a thousand sessions with the best marriage counselors.  It is free and has proven to be extremely effective when implemented in our marriages.

Ephesians 4:26-27 (New International Version 1984)
26 “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold.

This Scripture gives us the Christian Marriage advice necessary to resolve conflict with our spouse as it arises.

Step #1:  Do not make any rash decisions or act in emotion of the moment!

Although we all make this mistake from time to time, we often regret it and end up needing to apologize!  It is imperative that we calm down to the point where we can think rationally.

Step #2:  Discuss the situation that made you angry with your spouse today!

Although it is advised that we take a few moments to regain our composure if necessary, the marital problem tends to escalate internally if we do not discuss the issue at hand.   God’s anger management plan is to resolve our conflicts each day.  His way makes perfect sense and allows us to focus our attention on hopefully one situation at a time.   Although His plan is very simple to act upon, we have to follow it to be successful and stay prayfully connected with God.

Conflict resolution does take energy so if we are tired, it may be a good idea to agree to disagree, but make further discussion a priority for the next day.

Have you ever been angry with your spouse, but not sure exactly why?

I would be willing to bet that the true problem in the marriage was not dealt with that day.  And as time goes by, we tend to forget some of the particular details, but the anger remains in our hearts and prevents us from maintaining a healthy “closeness” with one another.  It quickly becomes a mess that is difficult to decipher the root of the problem anymore.

If we apply God’s Word every day, we can prevent the explosions that inevitably occur in marriage when this unresolved anger builds inside of us.

This Christian marriage advice must be applied individually in our marriages.  We cannot force our spouses to forgive us, but we can lead by example in the way we handle our anger with them.  Remember that our relationships will either be strengthened or weakened by the way in which we deal with conflict.

None of us will always be successful in meeting this Christian Marriage requirement, but it must be a goal we strive to achieve every day.  It is one of the key differentiating factors from a “worldly marriage”.

Challenge:  Physically post a reminder in your bedroom to resolve your issues today.  See if your spouse is willing to also make it a contract.  Sign it and hold YOURSELF accountable!

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